Trump dictionary…I is for

I. I . Best word in the English language. I am the best president ever. I don’t say that, but other people say that about I. I have done more than FDR, Lincoln and Reagan all in one year, that’s what they say about I. I don’t say that. Nobel Prize for I. I don’t say that. Other people say that about I. I. I .I.

Illegal. Mexican rapists. Salvadoran rapists. M16 gang members. Some are very young. Like 3 months old. Almost babies. Sad. They start raping at such a young age. Very sad. Not all. Just most. Some say Melanie is illegal. FALSE. She was a model. She did not come across the mountains from Mexico. She used to be a real knock out. Like Ivanka.

Immigration. Awful stuff. Terrible. Who are these people coming into my country. I was never an immigrant. No one in my family was ever an immigrant. I would send them all back. Back to Africa.

Immoral. Never heard that word. Fake word.

Investigation. Fake investigation. Spygate. Wait. Spygate is real. Mueller is fake. No indictments. No collusion.  All investigations are fake. Never should happen. Let’s investigate Hillary ! Lock her up.

Iran. Terrible country. Worst country on earth. No more nuclear deals with Iran. Many muslims in Iran.

Ireland. Fantastic country. They just banned all abortions. Fantastic job. Beautiful people. Many Irish in Ireland. Blarney Stone. Great stone. Very famous stone.

Israel. Fantastic country. Moved the embassy to Jerusalem. People said it couldn’t be done. I did it. Record time. Fantastic. Many Jews in Israel. Some people say Israel started as a Jewish nation. I don’t know. Time will tell.

Ivanka. WOW. What a beauty. If she wasn’t my daughter. Believe me. She is hot, hot , hot. Lucky Jared. Also very brilliant. She is amazing. See how she dresses? Very classy dresser. The best. WOW. That’s what people say.

(Feel free to add your own)

Who Was That Old Lady, Anyway?

When I was little we had an old lady living with us. We called her “Busia” (boo-shah). She had been born in Poland and came to the USA in 1913 by boat, two small kids in tow. In steerage. She was meeting her husband, who was already in the USA working in the mines.

When I knew her she was already pretty old. She didn’t speak English because she had had a stroke. It also left her right arm partially paralyzed so the time I accidentally slammed the car door on her she didn’t feel a thing. Small favors.

Her husband, who I never met, was long dead. Her only son went to war against the Nazis. He was shot down and killed over Germany. She had a flag. The US government had sent her a flag.

She cheated at cards. And when you tried to call her on it she could not (or pretended she could not) understand what you were saying. Hopeless. But she made the best potato pancakes I ever have had. Been trying to duplicate them for 50 years. Haven’t succeeded.

Who was this old lady? For a long time I thought she was a close family member with a “bone fide” relationship. For a long time I treated as though she was a member of the family.

The other day I found out I was wrong. The USA’s new, improved “travel ban ” from a number of countries has gone into effect. No longer can anyone emigrate to the USA. The only exceptions are people from these countries who are close family members. Who have a “bona fide” relationship to a citizen or legal immigrant. I think that is not such a bad idea.

So, who is included as a “close family member”? Parents, spouses, siblings, fiances and children.

And who is specifically EXCLUDED from the category of “close family member”? Who cannot claim a close family relationship. Who is, for purposes of sponsoring immigration, a “stranger”.

This may surprise some of you whose children have had children. Among those not in the category of “close family member” are  “grandparents”. Grandma and grandpa are not “close family members” Fiances are. But not Gramps.

Which brings me back to Busia. Busia was my mother’s mother. Who lived with us off and on for many years. She was my grandmother. Who , at the time, I THOUGHT was a fairly close relative of mine. Not so. My mother’s mother was something else. What was she?

Who was that old lady, anyway?

https://www.reuters.com/article/us-usa-immigration-ruling-idUSKBN19S08N

Movie Review: The Three Faces of Reed

(Reblogged from Siskil and Egbert’s Movie Reviews.)

A review of “The Three Faces of Reed”, (a remake of “The Three Faces of Eve”) newly released in the NY 23rd Congressional District.

Starring Jason Alexander (George Costanza of the Seinfeld TV series) as the inimitable, playful and sometimes a little off-center Congressman of NY’s 23 Congressional District, Tom Reed.

This film is set almost entirely in the psychiatric offices of an anonymous shrink in the Southern Tier of New York state. The shrink takes the Congressman back in time through hypnosis (since he cannot otherwise remember what he said or to whom he said it). It is a fascinating study of multiple personality disorder, otherwise know as PAU complex (Politics As Usual).  Jason Alexander does a wonderful job  (an Academy Award nomination is in the works,  I do believe) of portraying a politician who is able to assume different personalities almost at will. A man, who is short, balding and stubby but sees himself as tall, rugged and tough.

There is the (in his mind) tall, rugged, no nonsense, strong-jawed Congressman who is wined and dined by ALEC, the Hydrofracking industry and the NRA. He makes it clear to these lobbyists that he is at their beck and call. For example, a scene in which a widow  sits outside his office waiting for an appointment to see him about his vote to destroy the ACA.

(Scene:) Widow sitting quietly as secretary gazes into a computer screen. Muffled noises from the inner office slowly become louder and more distinct.

“Yes sir. …..Yes , sir…..Yes , sir……. Whatever you say , sir……. Of course, sir……. Just leave the bill on my desk and I will sponsor it…Yes, sir….Yes,  sir….Yes, sir…Oh, no need for that….Well,  if you insist…Thank  you so much , sir….Yes, sir… ”

Three middle aged men,  wearing Armani suits, emerge from the office, glance and sneer at the widow and give each other high fives. “He belongs to us, no doubt about it”. (End of scene)

Then there is the Constitutional scholar whose career as a mortgage broker has made him an expert on the Constitution, foreign affairs and women’s physiology. Another scene from the movie illustrates this Tea Party personality.

(Scene): The Congressman is standing in front of a group of carefully selected “constituents” and delivering one of his most profound and thoughtful speeches. Reed sees himself as 6 foot 5 inches tall and wearing an American flag draped over his shoulder as he peers, steely-eyed, into the carefully selected crowd.

“Founding fathers. 2nd amendment. Safe Act unconstitutional, I don’t care what the courts say. (applause) Obamacare BAD, unconstitutional.(thunderous applause) I  don’t care what the courts say. Heroes. We need to do more for our heroes. Our Veterans. (applause and standing ovation) We need to give them better care. We need to stop spending tax dollars on health care.(applause) We need to give our heroes better health care. Stop spending tax dollars on pork. I brought millions of dollars of federal aid to NY. We need to eliminate pork.

I support health care for our females. Stop Planned Parenthood. (standing ovation, thunderous applause, Star Spangled Banner playing in background) No more funding for abortions.  Not on my watch. Stop funding services for women. We need better health care for our women. Stop Obamacare. Keep government out of our lives. Make abortion illegal.   No more welfare. (applause) Love the unborn. End welfare for children. End birth control. 2nd amendment. No deal with Iran. No nukes for Iran. Nuke Iran. (thunderous applause along with a few “Heehaws”)Founding fathers. OK. Gotta go now”. (End of scene)

Then there is the third personality. The moderate. The sensible Mr Reed who only wants to do what is best for all of us.

(Scene): The Congressman appears at a photo op at the opening of a new gas station.

” I support small business. I love small business. I love America. I support women’s rights. I support sensible government. I support the flag and America. I think we can do better. We need to do better. I support those who support doing better. We can do better if we can only strive to do better. Liberty for all.  Let’s do better together. Together we can do better. Is that better? Don’t be scared. I really mean it (wink)” (end of scene).

So, who emerges at the end of the movie when all the personalities are finally joined? Will it be the “you wash my back and I’ll  wash yours” politician in the pocket of the fossil  fuel industry and the NRA? Will it be the Tea Party crazy who can’t decide if he wants to destroy health care for the poor, scuttle the arms deal  with Iran  and take away a woman’s right to choose or all of the above? Or will it be the smooth talking, say nothing,  do nothing , just get re-elected politician who has no real values or ethics?

We won’t tell you the ending. In the original film it was said that Eve and her personalities were finally joined. But a few years later she again disintegrated back into the multiple state. (Now called DID “Dissociative Identity Disorder”).So, she was never “cured” of her affliction.

What will happen to the Congressman in the end? Will his true personality ever emerge? Stay tuned. This reviewer suspects that there is a very lucrative lobbying career on the horizon at the end of the Hyrdofracking Rainbow for one of those personalities….

Deal or No Deal?

Welcome to the US Congress Game Show: Deal or No Deal? The show where members of Congress get to second guess every potential solution to every problem.  And , no matter how good the deal, they can try to squelch it.

Today’s deal is the Iran Nuclear Energy Agreement. Negotiated by the USA, Iran, Russia, France, Germany, China and the EU nations . Approved by the international community. Hailed as an achievement by all involved. They said it couldn’t be done…but they did it.

Now to our contestants. Any Republican in Congress. Doesn’t matter which one. They all think the same. Let’s call him Congressman Whitey White from anywhere outside of any urban area in any state.

Congressman White, here are some of the aspects of the deal.

1. Iran must be open 24/7 to inspections at all sites.

2. All of Iran’s plutonium and nuclear material will be monitored and accounted for by international inspectors  (International Atomic Energy Agency) on a regular basis.

3. Iran cannot develop the weapons grade materials for their reactors, again being monitored by international inspectors.

4. Iran must give up over 2/3 of its centrifuges which can be used to develop high grade plutonium. Which means they would lack the capacity, even if they could somehow cheat, to make any significant amount of weapons grade  material for many years.

5. After the IAEA inspects and verifies that Iran is in compliance (which will take some months) only then will Iran’s assets be unfrozen.  Those assets belong to Iran and are currently frozen, they are not US taxpayer dollars.

That’s the deal, Congressman. Now, if you do not take the deal there are the conditions.

1. Iran will be completely unmonitored  as to its atomic energy program and facilities.

2. Both the UN and the European Union have already began mechanisms for lifting sanctions on Iran whether or not the US follows suit. So, trade with Iran will likely begin.

3. Iran will deal their oil on the black  market.  Perhaps turning to China or Russia for support.

So Congressman White. What is it? Deal or No Deal?

Congressman White: NO DEAL, Barack. No deal. Bad deal. Can’t trust them. Bad people. Terrorists. Just like Obamacare. Dictator. Make him fail. Giving tax dollars to terrorists. Bibi says “no”. Bomb them back to the dark ages. We will be welcomed as liberators. Two week war. NO DEAL. NO DEAL!

Next up: Can the GOP Congress do anything to gain respect for themselves?