Vladimir Appleseed

In the early 19th century a man named John Chapman wandered around Pennsylvania, Ohio and other states planting orchards. Orchards of apples. As time went on and stories about his life changed he became a legend.

Images and stories of Chapman wandering across the country flinging apple seeds hither and yon. Creating orchards in his wake. So John Chapman earned the nickname of “Johnny Appleseed”. An American folk hero.

Of course there is a lot of truth in these stories. Johnny did plant orchards of apple trees. Then he protected them from wild animals by  fencing, as any good horticulturalist would do. He did travel across many states. He did spread apples across the “western”states.

Those seeds took root. He came out every year and tended those orchards. He made sure his wide ranging plantings were protected and managed. It worked. In the early 19th century clean water was not easy to come by. Which is why “cider” was a popular drink. The trees Johnny planted were not good for eating apples, but were great for cider. A real public service.

Now, on the internet, we have a new Johnny Appleseed. His name is Vladimir. He trolls through the vast web of on line information and plants the seeds. The seeds of dissent. The seeds of doubt. Flinging them hither and yon. Hoping they take root.

He is seeding and tending orchards of misinformation. Of false news. Of divisive, negative nonsense. He pretends he is a black man and sows seeds trying to divide blacks from whites. He pretends he is a Democrat or a Republican and sows seeds of hatred for the other side. He pretends he is a doctor and sows seeds of confusion concerning Covid-19. And it is working. Americans are confused. Divided as never before.

It worked in 2016 and it is working today. Vladimir Appleseed planted the misinformation of “Clinton Corruption” in 2016 and many folks devoured the apples. I recall doing a “search” on the name “Hillary Clinton” during the campaign. At one point the first 2 pages of links were all about the Clinton “health issues”

Of course, there were no health issues. But seeding the internet with false reports and bots, Vladimir Appleseed was able to push Clinton “health issues” to the top of the Google research pages. Because stories are placed in the order of how many others have clicked on the site. Not based on accuracy, just numbers. It worked.

So, Vladimir Appleseed is at it again. Joe Biden is some kind of child molester. Joe Biden has mental issues. Joe Biden is some kind of crook with contacts with the Ukraine. It’s all out there. Joe Biden is a racist. Joe Biden is a socialist. Seeded.

Now, Johnny Appleseed is an American hero. He was a fine man who spread the “good news”of apple trees. An overwhelmingly positive force. Except.

Except. John Chapman also planted a medicinal herb called “dogfennel”. An invasive, quick growing plant that has a certain odor. Unfortunately dogfennel is also poisonous. John didn’t know it, but he was spreading the seeds of poison as well as the seed of cider.

Johnny Appleseed spread apples and dogfennel. A great crop and a poisonous plant.

Vladimir Appleseed has skipped the apples and gone straight to the dogfennel. He knows exactly what he is doing. Spreading the seeds. The lies. the misinformation. And people are unaware of its poisonous properties.

 

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Johnny_Appleseed

https://plants.ces.ncsu.edu/plants/eupatorium-capillifolium/

 

Facebook Follies

I live in the country in western New York about 5 miles from a small town. There has been some controversy over the Facebook pages for this town. It got so bad that the mayor and others set up a new Facebook page.

What seems to happen on Facebook is that people get progressively ruder and ruder. Folks who would give you the shirt off their backs turn into folks who would shoot you in the back. People who would gladly buy you a drink turn into folks who would poison your coffee. Now why is that?

As in all things, I have my theories. Not original by any means.

One idea is the fact that Facebook is largely anonymous. But that’s not really the case here. Most folks use their real names (I think). I use mine. So, anonymity cannot be the reason.

Another idea is that communication is much more than words. But Facebook, except for the lame emojis, is all words. Words. And not spoken words, but written words. Now, psychologists will tell us that 70-93% of all communication is “non-verbal”. That is, body language. Voice inflection. What a person looks like. Tone of voice. Etc. (Although that number has been challenged as too high by some researchers).

So, if that is true it would mean that the written word is only 30% of what is being communicated. The rest you have to figure out. This may be where the problem rests.

My friends know that I tend to be sarcastic (Tend?) So, when I SPEAK my tone will tell them that. Even when I write my blog or posts people who know me know that I may be ironic or intentionally dramatic. Hyperbolic. Not totally serious. But, someone who only reads the words I write may come away with an entirely different perception. They don’t get the humor. No subtlety.

I mean, just today someone responded to one of my rather feeble attempts at sarcastic humor by calling me (or I should say, “writing to me”) a “fu…ing idiot.”

To be clear. I am not now, nor ever have, claimed I am NOT a “fu…ing idiot.” I could very well be a “fu…ing idiot.” God knows, if you took a poll of the people who know me best, the results may be conclusive in a way that I would not prefer. But whether I am or am not a “fu….ing idiot” is not the point.

The point is that IN PERSON I doubt that anyone would call me a “fu…ing idiot” right to my face. At least not until they got to know me. On Facebook and other discussion sites people often make assumptions beyond the words. And base their responses on preconceived notions, based on , well, “baseless” assumptions.

I will be the first to admit that I am not immune. As a liberal who believes in the necessity of social programs I have a particular point of view. I start from a place based on my own life experiences and analysis of the systems within which we live. I try to use research and information from good sources.

For example, when I worked as a poll watcher I worked with Republicans. We have very different ideas about government, society and the role of government in that society. Yet, we were able to be pleasant, even joking, with each other for a day at the polls. As human beings, face to face, we did not devolve into name-calling “fu…ing idiots”.

Yet, when I get on some of these posts I morph . Dr Jeckel and Mr Hyde. Or is it Heckel and Jeckel? I confuse the two. Reading someone else’s post can immediately put me into antagonistic mode. Arguments ensue. When that happens I notice that each side tries to cherry-pick a point or two that they see as the weakness in the other’s position. A little information is a dangerous thing. Taking a word or brief quote or statistic out of context can be a sword, but not a very useful one. Unless the only goal is to stab.

And that sometimes devolves into insults, open or veiled. Now, I don’t mind if someone IMPLIES that I am stupid. Or uninformed. As long as they can demonstrate they have evidence from a legitimate source to educate me. And as long as they are open to my evidence to the contrary.

This is where a breakdown occurs. A matter of sources. When people are getting their “information” from biased or questionable sources it means communication of other viewpoints becomes near impossible. I admit my main sources of information are the old stand bys. The New York Times. The Washington Post. The New Yorker. The Atlantic. Why these? Because all these sources have strong reputations for properly vetting information before they print it. That doesn’t mean they don’t make mistakes. But it means that as sources go you can be assured that there was no rush to print. And you can assume multiple sources for stories.

I had an online argument with a lady who simply said that she would not read the New York Times since they were not trustworthy. OK. Then we really can’t talk, because there is no common ground of evidence to discuss. (I want to make a distinction between the NY Times news and the NY Times EDITORIAL board. The editorial board tends to be liberal, no doubt. But the editorial board has no influence on the news sections).

So, can we discuss important issues on Facebook in a civil manner? I don’t know. But I do know that Facebook has a handy feature called “blocking”. I have blocked a couple people recently. Not because I disagree with them. Not because I don’t like their ideas. Not because they are always wrong and I am always right. I blocked them because they personally attacked me and one called me a “fu…ing idiot”.

And calling me a “fu…ing idiot” is reserved for family and friends.

Trump Free Tuesdays

Do you have what the white nationalists call Trump Derangement Syndrome (TDS)? The ever present depression caused by having the mentally ill guy in the White House? Do you suffer daily anxiety wondering if your fellow citizens are really stupid or racist enough to vote the conman back into office?

I feel your pain. But we all need a break. My solution?

A national movement to make Tuesdays free of anything Trump.

Trump Free Tuesdays.

While Fox news drones a constant approval of the idiot other networks, like CNN and MSNBC beat a drum of disapproval. Either way Trump wins. It’s Trump. Trump. Trump. 24/7.

No matter if you think he is god’s own gift to America or a two bit conman drowning in self-pity. Matters not. He makes for “good press”. So, he wins. The old marketer’s saying: There is no such thing as bad publicity.

This constant barrage of tweets, photo ops, tough guy talk and all around bullshit will have an effect on your psyche. Time to take break.

God created the heaven, Earth, day and night, all the animals and the entire universe in 6 days. On the 7th day she realized she had unintentionally created Donald Trump. (Something to do with a slip up when creating a snake and a slug) So, even god took a break. She rested. She cried. Then rested.

So, let’s turn off Donald Trump on Tuesdays. If the news comes on and mentions his name. Mute it. Or don’t turn on the news at all. If you are on twitter, don’t tweet. If your friends post an article about him on Fakebook. Ignore it. If you see a “Trump 2020” flag flying your area (Yep, I see them) keep your eyes on the road.

Give yourself and your psyche a break. Take Tuesday off. And remember, Trump is one of god’s creations. Forgive her. We all make mistakes. When you are god you make whoppers!

Of course, nothing hurts the mentally ill guy more than being ignored. He demands to be noticed. He wants to be in your head. So, let’s take back Tuesdays and make that day Trump free. A day we can enjoy. A day to imagine what it was like BC (before conman). A day to see only the brighter side of life.

Fake Numbers

News flash:

“A new report claims President Trump and members of his coronavirus task force are pushing the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC) to modify its coronavirus death-toll methodology in a way that could lead to fewer deaths being counted.

The report from The Daily Beast Wednesday cited five anonymous administration officials working on the federal government’s response to the pandemic. The outlet reports Trump has privately questioned the number of COVID-19 deaths in the United States, which topped 80,000 this week, and suggested they may be incorrect or inflated by the current methodology. ”

Over the past weeks we see members of the “real news” (right wing ) questioning the reporting of Covid-19 deaths. On one hand, most experts are convinced that the numbers, as reported are low.  Probably a lot more than the 85,000 reported deaths. People have died at home or people died before the the virus deaths were being counted. Nebraska has solved this problem by refusing to release the actual numbers of deaths. A truly Trumpian solution.

https://www.washingtonpost.com/business/2020/05/12/nebraska-coronavirus-case-numbers-meatpacking/

But the Trump position is that the numbers of deaths have been inflated. Trump’s political opponents have been using the death numbers to make him look bad. Many of these people who are reported as victims of Covid-19 are actually victims of other illnesses. It’s all a plot !

Based on this new interpretation of data it is time to look at other statistics and see if they have also been misinterpreted by the so-called experts. To investigate this I called my good friend Barney Flopbottom. Barney is a self-educated statistician who has never been tainted by a college education. He does have a degree in Statistical Science from Trump University. It cost him $25,000. But Barney says it was money well spent. Where else can you get a degree without attending a class?

So, I called Barney to discuss the nature of statistical data.

Me: Hi ,Barney, how you doing?

Barney: Well, I have a temperature of 105 and have been coughing up blood for 3 days. But those are just numbers. I’m ok.

Me: So, Barney, you have said in the past that gun death statistics, put out by the federal government, are wrong. Can you explain?

Barney: Well, not only are they wrong, they do not exist. We have no gun deaths in the US.Never did, never will. Same is true of the coronavirus. No one has died form the virus. Zero.

Me: Well, what about the murders of little children at Sandy Hook, or the shootings at Columbine or the Las Vegas shootings?

Barney: What about them? None of these were caused by guns. It is a hoax. A Democratic hoax. A libtard hoax.

Me: Well, we saw pictures of the deaths. We saw the children being murdered. In fact about 30,000-35,000 Americans die each years from gun violence. That means since the terror attacks on 9/11, over 600,000 American men, women and children are now dead because they have been shot with a gun.

Barney: HA! What a bunch of nonsense. Just like the fake numbers of Covid-19 deaths. The fact is , not a single man, woman or child has been killed by a gun or by the virus. It’s all fake news. Put out by people who hate Trump.

Me: Are you saying that 600,000 Americans were not killed by guns? Or 85,000 Americans have not been killed by the virus?

Barney: Exactly. Let me explain. Let’s say you were a 7 year old at Sandy Hook. going to school. Happy to be with your friends and teachers. A sweet little 7 year old. Now, some guy comes in with an AR-15 and shoots a bunch of kids and one or maybe 17 of the bullets hits you. Did the gun kill you? NO Did the bullet kill you? NO. What happens is this. The bullet enters, let’s say, your little beating heart. Now, the heart stops pumping blood so you die. It was the HEART that killed you, not the bullet. Or if the bullet hits your brain it is the brain damage that kills you, not the bullet!

Same with the coronavirus. The virus does not kill anyone. Use grandma as an example. Let’s say the virus enters grandma’s lungs and she stops breathing. It is the ABSENCE of air in the lungs that kills grandma.  So, stop blaming guns and the virus. Stop blaming Trump.

Me: So all the data on coronavirus deaths is wrong?

Barney: Amen. We need to redo all the statistics. Not a single death of the 85,000 has been caused by the virus. The cause of death should be: “Lung disease” or “heart failure” or “unknown” or “act of God”.  It’s all a plot to make Trump look bad. Time for the CDC to put out new, accurate numbers. ZERO.

Me: Well, Barney, I have to admit. It is hard to argue with that type of logic. I guess the numbers are all wrong. So, does this mean, what I think it means? We need to go back and change some of our historical misconceptions? For example, does this mean that the Holocaust deniers are all correct? That the Nazis did not kill 6,000,000 people?

Barney: Yep. Exactly. We need to rewrite the history books. The Nazis did not kill millions of Jews. That is just another example of fake news. It was a lack of food that killed some of them. Starvation. For others it was because they were breathing Zyklon B gas. Lung failure. Others died from exposure to the cold. Hypothermia. Isn’t it time we stopped trying to make Hitler look bad?

https://thehill.com/changing-america/well-being/longevity/497602-trump-administration-pushing-cdc-to-change-how-it

Lemons to Lemonade

Evolution of viruses and the susceptibility of the human body to the same has given us lemons. Kind of sour. But, that’s what we are stuck with. So, here are some ideas on how to make lemonade. Things you never had “time” for. Before the virus slowed us all down.

1.Plant a victory garden. If you have the room, plant your vegetables. If you never planted vegetables it is not hard to do. You can find all kinds of information about soil and weather and pests and watering and all that stuff on line. Or. You can throw some seeds in some halfway decent soil and get pretty much the same results. Plants are tough. Notice how those cracks in your sidewalk get quickly filled with green growing things?

If you are lucky enough to have land, dig it up. All you need is a couple inches of topsoil. Potatoes will grown anywhere. I have grown them in straw. Radishes are easy and fast. Nothing like a fresh radish plopped into your salad. Lettuce. Pole beans (got a fence?). Peas. Carrots (need good loamy soil for those) . All easily grown from seed . And seeds last for years, no matter what the packing date says on the package.

If you don’t have a lot of land, hell, dig up some lawn. A nice little victory garden will keep you busy a few hours a week and reap some tasty rewards.

2. Bills. Bills. Bills. How many years have you been promising yourself to organize those bills. Find the folders of old papers and revenue sheets. Pile em on the kitchen table . And sort. Now, what do you really need? Time to throw out the receipt from the microwave you bought in 2009. How many old automobile insurance proofs do you need? Those 1999 bank statements are useless, everything is on line now. Tax returns? Do you really think the IRS is going to audit you for the $33.46 you claimed for your mother-in-law’s soft toilet seat ? What about the IRA and pension statements. A waste of space. Now is the time to sweep out the paperwork. Join the e-age.

3. OK, set aside two days and let’s look into your closet. Begin with the two hole on the underwear rule. Any underwear with more than two holes ( I am not talking about your waist and legs) goes into the bin. Are you somehow emotionally attached to those thread bare heels in half of your socks? Dump ’em. And really, how many sweatshirts can you wear at once? Two is plenty. Now, about those shirts. The flowery ones. It’s not 1973 any longer. And the turtle necks? Send them Moscow Mitch. Well, if you really want to feel bad, try on ALL those pants you’ve been saving. Notice how 90% of them have shrunk in the waist over the past 8 years. I guess they don’t make em like they used to! Oh, you are waiting until you diet kicks in and you can wear them again? Note to self: Buy the Brooklyn Bridge.

4. Collections. Somewhere in the attic or garage or at the bottom of a closet is one of your prized collections. Dust it off. Peruse it. Enjoy it. I have an old coin collection I started in 1959. With one folder for pennies. Over the years I have added nickels, dimes and quarters. Time to catch up with all those years of blank holes to be filled. Maybe you have stamps. Old newspaper clippings. Photographs. Toys. National Geographics. Snails. Stones. Whatever. Time to sit down, handle the merchandise and enjoy it. Who knows, you might be re-inspired to take up the hobby again.

5. Reading. All those unread books on the shelf. Or the half read ones. The classics that you always wanted to read. Ulysses (I got through 20 pages and was so confused I gave up). How about a really great translation of the Iliad or Odyssey (I recommend Fagles, it’s pure poetry). The Federalist Papers. Or maybe some light science fiction. Any MAD magazines collecting dust? Escape fiction. Serious non-fiction. You have been saying you haven’t the time. Well, now’s your chance.

6. Baking. Cooking. All of a sudden I smell fresh bread in the house. And chocolate chip cookies. And new recipes. Spicy Indian food. Chinese stir frys in the wok. Homemade pizza. Rediscover what it was like before you got addicted to convenience foods. Stews. Stroganoffs. Potato pancakes. Never had time before. Now, no rush.

6. Quiet. Just quiet. Meditation if you want to call it that. A little yoga. Make up your own moves. A little chanting. OOOOOMMMMMM…OOOOOMMMMMM. Try not to rile up the dogs. Or the spouse. Just 10 minutes of quiet time. Every day. Just for you. You’ve got the time.

The virus has given us lemons. Make lemonade. Add sugar. Sweeten to taste.

 

 

Conan Outed

Conan is a hero. No, not Conan the Barbarian, the former governor of California. I am talking about a real life hero, not a pretend tough guy  movie creation. Conan the dog. The dog that was injured in the attack on al-Baghdadi. Evidently Conan has participated more than 50 missions. A real workhorse… er..  work dog.

Like many veterans who risk their lives to protect the USA and the president, Conan is an immigrant. Or at least comes from an immigrant heritage. He is , by ethnic group, Belgian. He comes from a lineage called “Belgian Malinois”. Looks like a German shepherd to me, but then a lot of these immigrants look alike. Especially the canine ones.

Things were going pretty good for old Conan before Trump opened his mouth. At the press gaggle Trump referred to Conan as “he”. A male dog. So, a reporter asked if he was a “good boy”. I guess any dog that would go into an ISIS enclave and sniff out terrorists would be considered a pretty good boy. So, that was that. Good boy. Good Conan.

But then, for some reason, not sure why,  the White House released a statement to reporters that Conan, was, in fact a “girl”. I think they meant that Conan was a female dog. OK. No big deal.Who cares? Really.  When I see a dog and ask the owner if I can pet it I usually refer to it as a “good boy” Sometimes the owner corrects me. OK.

Yesterday, taking our dogs, Teddy and Auggy,  for their annual shots I overheard a conversation between a couple of dog owners. This lady had a very small dog  (I thought it was a rat) . Another woman in the vets office asked the gender of the pooch. It was a male. Too bad, the questioner said. She had some leftover clothes from her own small female dog, but they were pink. So, of course, this male dog would not be interested. Really. I heard this conversation. Honest. What male dog would wear pink? (We all know “What kind”, don’t we?)

Back to Conan.  The White House issued a statement saying Conan was a girl. But this contradicted Mr Trump’s earlier  assertions that Conan was a male dog. Oops. So, the White House issued another statement saying Conan, was, indeed a MALE. A real MAN. Or man-dog. Just like Trump said.

Then the Department of Defense got into the act. Taking time out from the usual boring stuff like wars, they issued a statement that Conan was a “female”. I mean, Conan is their dog, so they should know. But that statement contradicted what Mr Trump had said.

So, using the most sophisticated technology available, the Department of Defense “triple checked”. Again, setting aside lesser issues like terror attacks, espionage, war crimes, military buildups, etc., the US Special Operations Command (USSOCOM) issued a definitive statement. Not about a terror attack or military operation. About something much more important.  They said: Conan is a male dog. End of story.

Or is it?

My secret sources tell me something different. Evidently Conan has been canned. Fired. Eliminated. Given his walking papers. His dog tags have been taken away.  Why? Because Conan’s sexuality has been discovered. Conan has been outed. Which gives one paws… er… pause.

Conan, you see, is actually a transgender canine. Hence the confusion. On his initial application for service he described himself as a male. And provided the appropriate birth certificate from Belgian (Or was it the Belgian Congo??).  As Conan matured he (and his trainers) realized that Conan was actually a female dog trapped in a male’s body. A doggette. So, a friendly vet hired by the vets… that would be a veterinarian hired by veterans… performed the needed operation. Conan is now happily female. A transcanine.

Hence the confusion. Boy or girl? Male or female? Dog or cat? Man or mouse?

Bottom line. Conan, the foreigner who happens to be transgender got the job done. He,  (or she or it) did his (or her or its) duty as a loyal American. To serve and protect. To get the bad guys. Which is true of a lot of members of the US military. Transgender or not. They get the job done.

Isn’t that enough?

Cracked

In Alaska a few days ago there was a swim meet. The winner was a 17 year old girl who  also happened to be the state champion. After the victory, she was disqualified by one of the judges.

What was her egregious rule violation? Did she test positive for drugs? No. Did she leave the starting area too soon and thereby gain an unfair advantage? No. Did she splash water in the face of an opponent? No. Did she reach across her lane and grab the leg of a fellow swimmer, slowing her down? No.

According to the official who nailed her, she was guilty of intergluteal cleft exposure. To be more specific, her butt cheeks were touching each other. AHA.

So, she was wearing an illegal swimsuit which gave here butt cheeks an unfair advantage? Well, no. She was wearing the same swimsuit she had worn before at other meets she had won. One provided by her school. The same one every other girl on the team was wearing.

Before I go on, let me digress.

In 1967 a zoologist name Desmond Morris wrote a book titled “The Naked Ape”. I recall reading it because it had the word “Naked” in the title.  Among other things there was a section about the development of sexual attraction in primates. He hypothesized concerning the evolution of human sexual attraction. Morris could not figure out why males are attracted to highly developed mammary glands. (If Jack is reading this, that means:  Why guys like big boobs).

After all, the function of mammary glands is to  produce milk. Hardly the elixir of love. Hey, baby, can I offer you a grassfed or a 2% low fat?

So, Morris hypothesized (read: imagined) that , like other primates, sexual attraction for men center on the female gluteus maximus (butt). That “rear entry” is the usual form of intercourse for most primates, except those who had been visited by Christian missionaries. So, as Morris further opined the development of large mammaries was an evolutionary adaptation. They mimicked the round ,large gluteal muscles that males find so fascinating. So, women had boobs because they look like butts. OK. Back to our story.

This 17 year old was disqualified for having too much of an intergluteal cleft exposed. There are approximately 7 billion humans on the planet right now, give or take 4 or 5. Every one of them, self included, is endowed with an intergluteal cleft. In my own case I had not seen my intergluteal cleft in years. I forgot it was there. Using mirrors I was able to find it. It was rather disappointing as clefts go.

I am reasonably certain that most 17 year old girls have a better looking cleft than I do. I mean, if I were an Olympic quality swimmer (presuming I could learn to swim) I would have to wear a suit that might show my cleft. Any judge that could keep down his lunch would undoubtedly disqualify me before I hit the pool.

Then again, you have to wonder about a judge (the ONLY judge) who fixates on the intergluteal cleft of a 16 or 17 year old female athlete. Why is the judge obsessed with the derrieres of the competitors? Why is one buttock touching another buttock (of the same person) of such concern as to demand a disqualification? I mean, golf has some crazy rules, but at least how your butt looks does not come into play. Thankfully.

There is a word for a judge who seems obsessed ( see Desmond Morris for details) with a young lady’s butt when he (or she) should be concerned with more important issues. Like rules. The term for such a judge can be found in the obvious place. Look deeply into the intergluteal cleft and you will discover the adequate definition for such a judge. No, look even deeper into the butt crack There is is!

ASSHOLE.

(Addendum: The ruling was overturned. The girl was awarded her victory.)

https://www.usatoday.com/story/sports/2019/09/10/swimsuit-controversy-alaska-teen-disqualified-showing-too-much-skin/2278671001/

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Naked_Ape

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Intergluteal_cleft

Words, Part 1

“In the beginning was the word…” so begins the Bible followed by both Christians and Jews.  In Hindu mythology, the word “Om or Aum” is the first sound of creation. The Qu’ran is thought to be the word of Allah by Muslims. Members of the Church of Later Day Saints believe that Joseph Smith of upstate New York was given the words of god on golden tablets.

Words are important. Of all the species still on Earth, it is homo sapiens alone that uses speech to communicate sophisticated ideas. Other animals use sounds to express fear and danger and affection and contentment. Chimps use signs and sounds. Bonobos have been taught to use symbolic language to express complete ideas. Some other primates even use sign language to communicate when hunting in groups. There is something in the DNA of primates that demands communication. We are all social animals.

Words are important.

Primates use body language and words to communicate. The key word is “communicate”. Communication does not necessarily mean that a human or other primate is interested in communicating the truth.

For example, we have evidence that when some Rhesus monkeys see food they call out to others and share it. Once in awhile, however, a monkey will keep quiet or even give a false predator warning cry to distract from the food source. They lie. They communicate something which is false. Then they sneak the food for themselves.

We depend on words. When someone lies to us it becomes very difficult to trust them again. When someone misuses words (that is lies) under oath, we consider them criminals. Even presidents. Bill Clinton was impeached by the Republican Congress for lying.

He was not impeached for having an affair. He was not impeached for any illegal financial dealings. The 4 year long investigation of Bill Clinton and his wife’s finances (Whitewater) found nothing illegal. The Starr investigation after spending mllions of dollars  found no criminal behavior based on the original mandate, which was to look at the Clinton land deals.

Both articles of impeachment against Clinton dealt not with any financial wrongdoing, but the fact that he lied about his sex life when under oath.  You may wonder why the Starr investigation was expanded into his sex life, but that is another matter. A corruption charge was never supported, but his lies about his sex life were considered important enough to expel him from the presidency. So, he was impeached for words he said.

Our current president has , according to the factchecker at the Washington Post, told over 2,000 lies and misstatements in less than his first year in office. Over 2,000 documented examples of intentional miscommunication. Since he is not under oath, none of those lies are actionable under the law. But that degree of miscommunication may be one reason why he has an approval rating below 40% in most polls.

When words are used for miscommunication then the very idea of language becomes damaged. Language is supposed to be a positive force through which we convey ideas and beliefs and emotions in an honest way. When language is exploited regularly to miscommunicate it leads to a general distrust of any communication. When words are used as weapons, rather than tools of honest communication, all language becomes suspect.

We see attacks on the press, attempting to delegitimize the one institution which is based on words. Honest words. ( I deal with this in another post a year ago: https://josephurban.wordpress.com/2017/01/30/lugenpresse-testing-the-waters/)

Politicians, of course, depend completely on words. When they lie by misstatements or omission to intentionally deceive people it is especially disturbing. We see them lie most often when the facts and evidence do not support their assertions. A good example is the reemergence of the supply side economics which failed miserably under Mr Bush. Tax breaks for the wealthy to boost jobs. It just does not happen, but that does not stop the lying.

My own Congressman, Tom Reed, NY 29 is especially adept at the half truth and miscommunication. He miscommunicated not only his own views (as seen by his actions) but impugns his political opponents by lying about their views as well. And he is very good at it. So he gets re-elected.

So, while “sticks and stones may break my bones but words will never hurt me” is true on the playground, it is not true in politics. Words are the core of politics because they are used to convince others to act.

We currently live in an era where those with the most political power are determined to stay in power through miscommunication. Not by the power of their ideas.  Not by the benefits to the people derived by their actions. But by miscommunicating to such an extent that even 2,000 lies a year does not bother them.

Next time I will look at the variety and scope of the miscommunication, the misuse of words, by those currently in power.

 

https://news.nationalgeographic.com/news/2009/06/090615-monkeys-lie-food.html

https://books.google.com/books?id=pEuVe5zT-4cC&pg=PA74&lpg=PA74&dq=rhesus+monkeys+food+lies&source=bl&ots=-A5bfEwk2c&sig=O1nv-XXYhQ78i5HQpx2hrNFXrzc&hl=en&sa=X&ved=0ahUKEwimo8G74tzYAhWDUd8KHYalBlgQ6AEIUDAL#v=onepage&q=rhesus%20monkeys%20food%20lies&f=false

https://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-srv/politics/special/clinton/stories/articles122098.htm

https://www.washingtonpost.com/news/fact-checker/wp/2018/01/10/president-trump-has-made-more-than-2000-false-or-misleading-claims-over-355-days/?utm_term=.dc90a42256a8

Something Deeper

Let me start by clarifying. I am not a conspiracy nut.

Lee Harvey Oswald acted alone. Bigfoot does not exist. The “government” did not take down the Twin Towers on 9/11 as an “inside job”. Millions of illegals do not vote in US elections. There is no  secret cabal of Jewish bankers running the world. The UN is not trying to destroy freedom in America. Etc. Etc. Etc.

I am a fact guy. A pragmatist. Show me the evidence and I will consider your case. But evidence is a must.

Which brings me to the latest, ongoing attacks by Mr Trump on the free press. Over and over he has been slamming any news organization that does not pay him proper homage as “the enemy of the people”. All news that is not completely positive is FAKE news.

Why keep harping on FAKE news? Why continue to try to undermine faith in such news organizations as the New York Times, Washington Post, Politico, The LA Times and others? News organizations that once in awhile make mistakes  but have spent years cultivating processes that lead to accurate reporting. News organizations that vet sources and double check  facts before putting ink to paper.

Mr. Trump is a stupid man. Yes. He is. He knows virtually nothing except how to put together real estate deals. How to manipulate  (or rather HIRE accountants to  manipulate) the tax code. He is singularly UNCURIOUS about the world. He has demonstrated no understanding of basic science, literature, history, sociology or any other field. Since he was given $13,000,000 by his father as a young man his existence has been one of self-promotion. Period.

But, Mr Trump is also a clever man. A con man. A manipulator of his supporters. A cult figure. He sees himself as larger than life. And so do the Trumpsters and Trumpettes who follow him. He knows how to use the media for free publicity, as he showed us in his  campaign for president. He hates any media that does not adore him. And he encourages his followers to do  the same.

But he WON the election in the electoral college. He is the president of the United States. So, why continue to attack the press? He won. He beat them, at least in his way of thinking.

As I said, I am not a conspiracy nut. But there is something deeper going on here.

The “leaks”, which every president hates, have gotten to Trump. He even had Sean Spicer take away the phones of his (Spicer’s) staff and had them checked for possible news leaks. Trump calls the leaks FAKE news, yet he seems to be giving credence to the validity of the information. Otherwise, why try to find the source?  If these negative reports are really “made up”, as he says, then why suspect his own inner circle?

I suspect something deeper is going on.  There are skeletons, probably Russian ones, in Mr Trump’s closet. There are connections, financial  and political, with Russian oligarchs. Perhaps with Putin himself. Connections that may be illegal or at least very damaging .

By trying to destroy the public confidence in the press, Mr Trump is staging a Pearl Harbor attack. Destroy the credibility of the press. then, when the stories come out about his corruption people may say it is simply the press out to “get him”. Mr Trump likes to control the agenda and he seeks to marginalize legitimate investigative journalism by preemptive strike. The press LIES. All the time. Don’t believe them.

Something is deeper here. Not just the rantings of our first  (and god help us, our LAST) twitter president. He is the master of distraction. He has called the New York  Times and Washington Post losers and his enemy.They did not  crumble.  When distraction  does not work he goes for destruction. Exactly the same way he did business in his real estate shenanigans.

There is something deeper here. And the press will discover it. Sooner or later. After all, Pearl Harbor was not a total defeat, it was a setback. Eventually the US won the war. The free press will not  be governed or destroyed by Mr Trump, no matter how hard he tries. But he is trying to set the stage for the inevitable investigations into his financial and political  chicanery. He hope to destroy the confidence of the citizenry in the free press. In the end, they will find him out. And publish.

The is something deeper here. Wait for it.  It will happen.

Lugenpresse…Testing the Waters

At a Trump campaign rally in Ohio two of the Trump supporters called out to the journalist filming that rally that he was “lugenpresse”.  A term used by the Nazis to condemn any newspaper or journalist that did not toe the party line . Especially newspapers owned by Jews. The epithet aimed at any newspaper that criticized the Nazi Party. Or failed to bow down to the Fuhrer. “Lying press”.

On Sunday Kellyanne Conway did her weekly news “alternative fact” show, this time in an interview with Chris Wallace.  While not using the term, she echoed the sentiments of the “lugenpresse” when she wondered aloud why many members of the press had not been fired.  Why? For their coverage of Donald Trump.

She wondered why these members of the press were not dismissed by their bosses. Why they continued to appear on talk shows and give their opinions. Why are they not being silenced?

One of the first things the Nazis did when they gained control of Germany was to intimidate and suppress the free press. I say “gained control” because the Nazis never won the popular vote in a free election. They were always a minority party. Hitler was able to get only 32% of the vote for president in the last free election in Germany, with massive support from the rural  areas.

Once the Nazis did gain power they were quick to use it to suppress any opposition. Key to that was the free press. Communist newspapers. Jewish-owned newspapers. Independent newspapers were quickly brought under the control of the new regime. By intimidation.

The “lugenpresse” were any newspapers or journalists who dared contradict the Nazi facts. The Nazi “alternative facts”. Control of the media was seen as crucial to ultimate control of the nation.The opposition, no  matter how slight, must be silenced. Real news must not be reported. Facts must not be reported. An “alternative ” reality must be established with Goebbels deciding what is acceptable. The idea that the press must be the mouthpiece of the government  was the goal. And , for the most part, it was.

Kellyanne Conway and Steve Bannon are testing the waters. Attacking the press. Calling for the removal of those who dare criticize. Calling for a ban on people of the Muslim faith based on an idea that Muslims are all terrorists and all alike. Mr Trump calling into question the actual photographic evidence of the crowd size at his inauguration.  An attempt to bully the leader of Mexico into paying for a wall that Trump wants to build.  The first “press conference” with Sean Spicer, Mr Trump’s spokesman, was an attack on the press. And the attack ended with Spicer walking off refusing to answer questions. The message was clear. We will control the press. We cannot allow any contradictions or criticisms.

An all out attack on the facts, evidence and common sense. An “alternative” reality compete with “alternative  facts”

They are testing the waters to see how far they can go. Can they bully the press into silence? Can they bully our neighbor into compliance? Can they bully the American people into subservience? Can they bully the GOP controlled Congress into silence?

I think not. (Well, maybe they CAN bully Congress). The USA in 2017 is not Germany in 1933. The US citizens in 2017 are not going to sit back while Muslims are treated harshly and Mexicans are stereotyped and the free press is under attack. And the press is not going to roll over to an alternative reality.

The Trump folks are testing the waters to see how far they can go. Those waters will get hot very quickly.

(Note: The most thorough set of books on the Nazi rise to power is the trilogy by Richard J Evans. The Coming of the Third Reich, The Third Reich in Power and The Third Reich at War)

Carolina on My Mind…or in My Toilet

North Carolina just passed a law about using public bathrooms. I assume LGBT folks using bathrooms has become a statewide epidemic of sorts! While I usually don’t care what kind of genitalia anyone else in the bathroom is packing, I thought I better clarify some issues so I don’t break any laws. Or customs.

This is a copy of a letter I submitted to the Charlotte Observer.

 

Dear Folks. I am coming down to North Carolina this October to play some golf and am a bit concerned about the new bathroom law just passed. I guess I don’t understand it so maybe you can answer some questions so I don’t make a fool of myself. Or break any laws.
1. When I enter a restroom will I have to drop my pants so the attendant can see whether or not I have the proper equipment? If so, would you suggest boxers or briefs?
2. If I suspect the “guy” (or maybe not the “guy”) in the next stall is not really the “guy” in the next stall, should I dial 911 to handle the emergency?
3. Will I need to bring a birth certificate to verify that I was born with the right equipment and have not just added it later on a whim? Will a photocopy be acceptable? (I don’t want another Obama situation!)
4. Can I ask a fellow toilet user to produce his (or “her”) equipment if I suspect he (or she) may be hiding, or not hiding, something? Like a “citizen’s arrest”?
5. Are the public restrooms now clearly labeled: Men, Women and Other? And do you still have some labeled: Whites Only?
6. If my equipment is challenged by another “guy” will I have to appear in court and produce proper evidence?
Not being a lawmaker or a lawyer I am afraid that I might inadvertently make a “faux pas” by using an inappropriate facility.
I am really looking forward to heading into North Carolina. Up here in Yankee land we are dealing with unemployment, poverty, gun violence, high taxes, etc. It will be a real pleasure to relax in a place where the biggest problem is determining the sex organs of fellow facility users.

(signed) Joe Urban

Lincoln-Douglas Debates Redux

I just finished reading the original Lincoln-Douglas Debates of 1858. Both were running for the Illinois Senate seat. Douglas was the incumbent.  The debates half the time centered on the key issues of the day and half the time were used to attack the opponent as corrupt or dishonest.

Still, they discussed their different philosophies about slavery, the Dred Scott decision, the Missouri Compromise, the Wilmot Proviso, the Mexican War, the Fugitive Slave Act and the Nebraska question. As well as the original intention of the “founding fathers” regarding the spread of slavery. Heady issues of the times.

What was most fascinating, though, was the format. No “moderators”. No “gotcha” questions”. Just a timekeeper. Over the course of the seven debates the format was the same. One candidate was given a full hour to speak. His opponent was given one and a half hours for rebuttal. Then the first candidate was given half an hour to respond. Three hours total. Over the course of the debates Lincoln and Douglas each had ten and a half  hours to explain their philosophies and positions on the great issues of the day.

I wonder what a Lincoln-Douglas debate, using today’s typical format and analysis, would look like. Here goes.

Moderator: Welcome to the first and only debate between “Honest Abe” Lincoln and the “Judge”, Stephen A Douglas. This debate is sponsored by the FauxNews/ABC/CBS/MSNBC/ESPN/Hollywood/Shopping Channel consortium.  The format is as follows. Each candidate will get 30 seconds to answer a question, then his opponent will get a 30 second rebuttal. We hope to delve into the important Constitutional, social, economic, social and political issues of the day.

Moderator: First question to “Honest Abe”. Mr Lincoln, isn’t it true that you slept with a man for many years . Doesn’t this imply that you support gay marriage.

Lincoln: Well, while it may be true that I did sleep in the same bed as a fellow for a while, let me put that in context. At the time many young men without means rented cheap rooms at boardinghouses and shared accommodations as a matter of economic necessity.  This in no way….(BUZZER)

Moderator: Your time is up. Now, to the “Judge”. Senator Douglas. What do you think of Mr Lincoln’s support for homosexuality and gay marriage.

Douglas: First, let me thank the press and the fine audience here. I see many supporters and some detractors. I hope you will give both Mr Lincoln and I the courtesy of listening carefully to our arguments and positions. Now, regarding Mr Lincoln and…(BUZZER).

Moderator: Your time is up. Next question for the “Judge”. Senator Douglas, Kim Kardashian has recently called both you and Mr Lincoln racists. What is your response?

Douglas: Well, I don’t know who this particular person is (LOUD GASPS from the audience) but I have always said that the United States was formed by white men and for white men. If that makes me a racist, so be it. Any white man today would hold the same opinion.Furthermore…(BUZZER)

Moderator: Abe. Your response?

Lincoln: I am afraid that you have me at a disadvantage, sir. Like my friend the Judge, I have no idea what news organization this Mr Kardashian works for (more LOUD GASPS from the audience, and chuckles of disbelief from the moderator). I have always held that the Negro is a human being, but is , of course, inferior to the white man in every way. However, let me add…(BUZZER).

Moderator: Well, there you have it, the only debate between Lincoln and Douglas . Fascinating stuff. Now , to our analysts, Huck and Sarah. Tell us who won?

Sarah: You betcha I will. First, old Abe. A catastrophe. I don’t know who did his makeup but those ugly lines and big nose? Give me a break. His suit was way too small. His looks like a big ape . Gangly and awkward. Definitely not going anywhere in politics.  Judge Douglas. Well. Here cums da judge. Here comes da judge. Hahahaha. Dressed to a “T”. Great suit. Great tie. I would only suggest he wear lifts to make himself a little taller. A clear win for Senator Douglas in my book.

Moderator: And Huck, what is your analysis? Who won?

Huck: Well, I think the American people were the big losers today. Neither of these candidates is fit for high office. Lincoln sidestepped the gay rights issue. What is he hiding? And Douglas never did explain his ideas about white supremacy. What does he really believe? But the clincher was this. Neither candidate seemed to know who Kim Kardashian is? Really? You expect us to believe that? The most important political analyst-dancer-TV personality of modern times and neither of these candidates had a clue? Both are UNFIT for public office. Case closed.

Moderator: So you have it. An in depth look at the issues and candidates. Stick around for the next two hours as we air our special ” When  Sasquatch Goes to the Mall”. And don’t forget to vote. It is your duty. I think voting this year is sometime in November…or is it October..? Google it.