Trump’s 9/11

Today is the anniversary of the attacks on the Twin Towers on 9/11/2001. About 3,000 Americans were killed. The perpetrators were Saudi Arabian nationals who followed the cult leader Osama bin Laden.

An American tragedy.

Imagine Mr Trump had been president instead of George Bush.

September 12, 2001, President Trump holds a press conference.

Question: . Mr President, what is your response to yesterdays’ attack?

Mr Trump: It was horrible. Terrible. Billions of dollars in property damage. And you know, now that the Towers are down, 40 Wall Street, which I happen to own is actually the tallest building in New York city.

Quetion: Well, Mr President 40 Wall Street is the 32nd tallest building, not the tallest. But, what is your response to the attack?

Mr Trump: Well, you need to look it up and stop with fake news. 40 Wall Street is now the tallest building. Trust me. I know. Trust me. The big issue is the terrible destruction. You know, that is some of the most expensive property in the world. The entire world. A lot of people don’t know that, but that part of Manhattan is very , very expensive. And the taxes. You wouldn’t believe the taxes.

Question: Mr President, what can you say to the people who have lost loved ones in the attack?

Mr Trump: First of all, this was a disaster. A very bad thing. A terror attack. Who knew? Something we never faced before. I take no responsibility. Not my fault. President Clinton left us no military. None. I have built up up military like no one ever knew. They said it couldn’t be done. No one ever spent on the military like me.

Question: But, Mr President, what do you say to those who have lost loved ones in the attack?

Trump: Well, it is very sad. A sad day. Many people died. Many were killed. Not my responsibility. It is what it is. I mean, the United States has attacked people also. So. It is what it is.

Question: Mr President, what will be the US response to this attack?

Mr Trump: Well, we are looking into this. We have some very fine people looking into this. I think the governor of New York has a role to play. This happened in New York. Also, the governor of Pennsylvania where one of the planes came down. You know, that plane crashed in Pennsylvania. That is a state near New York. Very close. So, we will help the governors respond. But this is really a state problem. Every state may look at this differently.

Question: So, you are not going to have a military response to this?

Mr Trump: Well, I am smarter than all the generals. I mean, I have the biggest brain. I took a test. I can name 5 names in a row. The doctors were amazed. They said no one ever had done that before. So, we have a beautiful military. A fantastic military. The best in the world. I rebuilt it. They said it could not be done, but I did it. Many good contracts.

Question: But, Mr President, are you going to respond to bin Laden and the Taliban?

Mr Trump: We are looking into this. Some people say it was terrorists, others say it was an inside job. Some say bin Laden, others say it was the liberals. We will have to see. I saw on the news last night that it was impossible for the planes to take down those towers. Some people say it was detonations set inside the towers. I don’t know. We will have to look into that. Maybe it was an inside job by the Democrats to make me look bad.

Question: So, you are not going to do anything?

Trup: Well, I am not going to jump up and down and scream. No. Not my style. I keep calm. Calm people down. Don’t get excited. Keep in mind, we have thousands of people killed in traffic accidents every year. Some of these radical would close the roads! But you ask what I will do. Well, first of all, I am issuing an executive order giving tax relief to all the companies that owned office space in the Twin Towers. I am also signing an order paying them from the US Treasury for any office space they rent in 40 Wall Street or the Trump Towers. Two fantastic locations. They will be very happy there, believe me. Great locations.

Question: What are your plans to visit the site?

Mr Trump: Well, as you see from the photos it is a very dirty place right now. Windy. Not good for my hair. I am going to golf at Trump National Golf Club Bedminster next week. A fabulous course. They should hold the US Open there. Fantastic course. Some say it’s the best course in the world. I don’t know, that’s what people say. If I have time it’s a short helicopter ride over the site. I plan to throw down some paper towels to help with the clean up. Very important to clean up the mess. Prime property. It will take a lot of money to build there, believe me.

Question: So, don’t you think as president you should visit and show some leadership and concern for the dead Americans?

Mr Trump: Now, that is a very NASTY question. Very nasty….

Mr Trump walks off the podium…..

https://www.washingtonpost.com/politics/2018/09/11/trump-pointed-out-that-he-now-had-tallest-building-lower-manhattan-he-didnt/

https://www.washingtonpost.com/politics/2019/09/12/trumps-fuzzy-vision-sept-attacks/

The Barr Reports

I won’t go into the current Barr Report which proves without a doubt that the Mueller probe was a witch hunt. After all, the 440 pages show conclusively that there was no Russian interference and Trump is without blemish. So, I don’t even need to read the report. Barr has done that for me. I suggest you don’t read the report either. It is long and there aren’t any pictures. It will just confuse you.

So, that led me to do some research into previous Barr reports which many folks don’t know about. Here are a few I found that were authored by William Barr over the years..

Commission of Pearl Harbor Attack. 

“There is some evidence that an attack occurred on Pearl Harbor on December 7, 1941. We cannot be certain who attacked the US forces or if, in fact, the attack rises to the level of an “act of war”. The most holy Emperor of Japan has rejected any responsibility for this act and the Japanese navy has likewise stated they have no idea about what happened. Some have even questioned whether such an attack ever took place. So, at this time I must conclude that Japan has been totally exonerated of any criminal activity.”

Moses and the Ten Commandments.

” I have investigated the stone carvings brought down the mountain by Moses. Evidence suggests these were given to Moses (a JEW) by god (aka Yahweh) himself. We cannot report to the public the entire Ten Commandments due to matters of national security. Also, it might hurt some people’s reputations. After months of review I am releasing the redacted version .

“I am the Lord thy god, thou shalt not have other gods before me

Thou shalt (redacted) kill.

Thou shalt ( redacted) commit adultery.

Honor thy father and (redacted).

Thou shalt (redacted) covet they neighbor’s wife.”

The Nazi Death Camps.

“There have been unconfirmed reports that Hitler and the Nazis engaged in the mass extermination of Jews in Germany. We have investigated these charges thoroughly and have come to the following conclusions.

First, Hitler, in his written responses to our questions, has said that he cannot recall any such death camps. He was asked a variety of questions about this and 36 times his memory failed him.He was not available for an actual interview because he was busy vacationing on the Polish border.

Second. There have been no victims coming forth claiming they were exterminated. A basic point of law is called corpus delicti.  If there is no body there can be no crime. It is true that there were a whole lot of ashes, but Hitler says he was just having bar-b-ques and we have no reason to doubt him.

Third. Even if there are death camps we have nothing tying them to Hitler. Just because a few of his underlings may or may not have engaged in wholesale murder that does not implicate the man who gave the orders. Especially since we have no emails from Hitler specifically calling for the death on any particular Jew.

Our conclusion. The Death Camp claims are fake news, A witch hunt by those trying to undermine der Fuhrer.”

The 9/11 Attacks.

“On September 11, 2001 two planes flew into the Twin Towers. That is an indisputable fact. Those planes were flown by citizens of Saudi Arabia. Some claim this was a “terrorist ” attack. Our investigation reaches a different conclusion.

We have concluded that planes were flown into the WTC by accident. First, at no time did the Saudi government claim they were behind the attack. In fact, they were so upset by the attack that members of the Royal Family of Saudi Arabia flew out of the US despite the grounding of all other commercial and private aircraft.

Also, since we were not allowed to interview the ALLEGED terrorists we have no way of knowing their “state of mind”. And “state of mind” is essential for proving a criminal act.

Furthermore , since these pilots had no experience flying big commercial jets it is quite probable that they simply lost control of the aircraft and had no intention of flying into the buildings. Some accounts suggest that thousands of Muslims were in New Jersey watching the planes as part of a planned airshow and actually cheered when they hit the buildings. This leads us to consider that the entire situation may have been one big mistake. No, there is no evidence of collusion. ”

Obama Born in Kenya.

“We have investigated the claim that Obama may have been born in Kenya and so was an illegitimate president.

Consider, two newspapers reported his birth in Hawaii. Also, a hospital and doctor documented his birth. His mother was in Hawaii and is registered as the birth mother. There is no evidence of him being born anywhere else. The Hawaiian government has released certified copies of his birth certificate. Members of the press have visited Hawaii and viewed the original documents.

On the other hand, someone put out an email and claimed Obama was born in Kenya.

Our conclusion: Based on the evidence we conclude that Obama, was, in fact, born in Kenya. we come to this conclusion based on two factors. He is black, as are many Kenyans. Also, President Trump has said Obama was born in Kenya. That’s good enough for me.”

 

 

National Emergency 101 Quiz

If the following IS a national emergency answer YEPPER. If not, answer, NOPER.

1. Russia actively interferes with the 2016 election and helps Donald Trump get elected?

2. The Trump administration cuts funding for the FBI task force investigating and trying to prevent Russian election interference in 2020?

3.At the World Trade Center catastrophe of 9/11/2001,  3,000 Americans were killed. Since then, an average of 3,000 Americans each month have been killed by guns . That is a total of over 612,000 Americans killed by guns. National emergency?

4. The hottest, driest years on record due to global climate change have lead to extensive fires and droughts?

5. The US and Russia pulling out of the arms reduction agreements?

6. Over 25,000,000 Americans without quality health insurance due to the recent erosion of the ACA?

7. A record 22 trillion dollar debt, built up largely due to the 2 trillion dollar tax giveaway to the wealthiest 1%?

8. Growing and eventual insolvency of Social Security unless action is taken immediately?

9. Selling off of national parks, created long ago by Teddy Roosevelt,  to the fossil fuel industry for the short term economic gain of a dying industry?

10. A family of Guatemalans, including a 5 year old and a 3 year old,  fleeing death in their homeland, are posing a major threat to US safety and security?

If you answered YEPPER to # 10, you are an idiot.

You Never Know

The idea that Trump or Cruz could be elected president is almost unimaginable to anyone with a…well…to anyone. They both have a long history of dishonesty and fabrication. So,  how could either of these two clearly incompetent men ever win that high office.

Well, as grandma used to say regarding just about anything . “You Never Know”.

After all. There are still people who…..

…are convinced that Barack Obama was born in Kenya. No amount of evidence  like a birth certificate, two Hawaiian newspaper notices or witnesses to his birth (I do believe his mother was there) will change their minds. Was he born in Kenya? You never know.    https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Barack_Obama_citizenship_conspiracy_theories

…believe that the Affordable Care Act allows the government to establish death panels. These death panels will decide if and when to execute you or me. I should live so long. Have the death panelists earmarked anyone for execution yet? You never know.   https://josephurban.wordpress.com/2014/10/29/clarence-avoids-the-death-panels/

…insist that Sasquatch is real. They know he or she is real because they have seen the videos. And videos, we have learned, do not lie. And for further proof, there is an entire industry devoted to Sasquatch paraphernalia. They couldn’t sell Sasquatch stuff if it wasn’t real!  There is even a Sasquatch DNA site. God, I hope I’m related ! I could be. You never know.      http://www.sasquatchgenomeproject.org/index.html

…deny that the climate is changing. Or, if it is changing , then human activity has nothing to do with the overall increase in global temperatures. Some of the more astute deniers point out that it still snows sometimes, which thoroughly debunks any “global warming” claims. If it was cold today how can the earth be warming up? This entire global warming hoax could be a plot by Al Gore to make millions! (Remember him? The guy who received 500,000 more votes for POTUS than GW Bush?)  Or is it a plot by COMMUNISTS?  The commies are still hanging around. You never know.        http://www.commieblaster.com/climategate/

…insist that Bill Clinton is responsible for 9/11.  ….http://wonkette.com/595179/its-official-bill-clinton-did-911

…are certain that Hillary Clinton refused to send aid to the American ambassador in Benghazi.    http://www.frontpagemag.com/fpm/261442/hillarys-benghazi-stand-down-order-exposed-kenneth-r-timmerman

…have been abducted by aliens. No, not all the Mexican/alien rapists that Trump told us about. Real aliens. The UFO-type. Weird eyes. Pointy heads. Pushed in noses. NO, NOT Trey Gowdy. Real aliens. Trey Gowdy…hmmmmm?             https://josephurban.files.wordpress.com/2016/01/157bc-pinhead.jpeg

http://www.ufocasebook.com/alienabductions.html

…will believe whatever they want to believe.   http://www.theflatearthsociety.org/cms/index.php

So, can Cruz or Trump ever be elected president? As frightening as it is…You Never Know.

Trump’s Loaves and Fishes

News (?) item: Donald Trump insists that “thousands ” of Muslims in New Jersey were celebrating the fall of the World Trade Center on 9/11. He insists and although there is no visual or written evidence of this…well…he insists.

A long time ago  a Jewish guy named Jesus Son of Joseph was making a big campaign speech on a hill. He had ’em in the palm of his hands. They were enthralled. He was beatituding the hell out of them. But then he realized that he forgot to call the caterer. The crowd was hungry.

One of his producers had some fish and loaves of bread. So, Jesus Son of Joseph took a couple fish and a couple loaves and did some magic. He blessed them and passed them out and told the crowd there was plenty to eat.

And they crowd ate it up. Jesus Son of Joseph, Jewish carpenter and magician, turned the tiny loaves and fish into enough food to feed the multitude. He transformed a few bits of food  into an enormous feast. His followers were satisfied.

Last week another Jewish magician, Donald Trump, did essentially the same thing.

A couple days after 9/11 it was reported that 5 people of “middle eastern” ancestry were taking pictures of the Twin Towers and shouting in a foreign language. In New Jersey.

The police investigated. They found 5 Israeli immigrants. (Jews look a lot like Arabs!) They had been taking pictures. No one really knows what they were saying. They were not dancing in the street. They were gaping at the site of the tallest buildings in the world come tumbling down. As we all did.

Donald Trump, the magician, has transformed these 5 Jewish loaves and fish into “thousands and thousands ” of Muslims. He transformed a handful of curious onlookers into a crowd of joyous haters. A mass conversion of Jews into Muslims. He multiplied  the 5 into thousands.

Trump  gave his crowd another serving of bigotry to eat. And his multitude was satisfied. They had seen a miracle.