Tag Archives: citizens

I’m Entitled…A Deal’s A Deal

Some states, New Jersey and Michigan come to mind, have decided that pensions for teachers and other public employees are too costly. So, they have cut back. Changed the rules. Old people have become too expensive. People retired, thinking they had a deal. Then the rules were changed. After the game was over.

First, a true story. A guy who delivers my firewood also takes down trees. I’ll call him Luke. I asked Luke to look at a massive cherry tree in my yard and he said he could take it down for 50 bucks. That was a good deal. A 30 minute job. Luke came back in his coveralls with his chain saw and well, it wasn’t as easy as we thought. The tree got caught up. He had to take down another maple next to it. Then he cut up the trunk into usable pieces for me. Took about 2 hours.

Now, it comes time to pay Luke. I give him the $50 and try to give him more. No. He won’t take it. I said, look, you took down two trees, cut them up, the job was much bigger than we thought. Take some more money. No. Luke would have none of it. His exact words. “A deal’s a deal”. End of discussion.

I taught in NY schools for over 30 years. Put money into the retirement system. Every check. My wages were so low that, as a professional teacher there were years when my family was eligible for welfare. WIC. A college degree, graduate school, a teaching certificate all lead to welfare subsidy. Which is okay. I knew what I wanted. Worked every summer to make ends meet. But I paid into the retirement system. Every check. Social security. Every check. Medicare. Every check. Just like public employees in Michigan and New Jersey and Wisconsin and Kansas and every other state in the union.

Am I ENTITLED to my retirement check? You bethcha. I paid in and took lower wages for a reason. A deal’s a deal.

I started working at 16. Paid Social Security. Paid Medicare. Paid federal taxes. Paid state taxes.
Now I am retired and I get free money from Uncle Sam. Social security every month. Now I am on Medicare. Am I one of Mitt Romney’s 47% ? ENTITLED? You betcha. I deserve it. A deal’s a deal.

I get more than a little irritated at the “young gun” GOP governors who are trying to balance their budgets by stripping pensions and retirement plans. Cutting taxes on the better off citizens and taking dollars out of the pockets of retirees. They have no clue. They have no understanding of what people in the past gave up to get those guaranteed pensions. They have no shame. They have no integrity.

They are deaf to the basic contract. They do not believe that “A deal’s a deal”.

Maybe I should order them some firewood. And have Luke deliver it. Maybe, just maybe, a little bit of Luke would rub off . But I doubt it.

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Filed under Christie, Debt, economics, Economy, Education, GOP, government, neoconservatives, Republicans, Taxes, tea party

Gaydar Sale… Finally A way to Know For Sure

Hi. This is Ron Popeil for Ronco. The makers of the Ronco Potato Peeler and Car Sponge. Here to help you once again with a household problem. Now that Indiana has become the 21st state to make Gay hate legal there is a real need for discovering who really is gay. Can you tell by the way they walk? Sometimes. Can you tell by the way they talk ? Maybe. But in today’s world so many gays look and talk and act like normal people…how can you REALLY know.

If your restaurant does not want to serve gays, how can you be sure that burly muscle man is not a secret gay?? He may not be lisping, but is he eyeing your manhood from behind those bifocals? And how can you know if that “birthday cake” you are baking for that 5 year old might be going to house where her lesbian aunt might show up and have a slice ? Well, you don’t know. And you didn’t bake that cake for gay taste buds to enjoy !
Gone are the days in Germany where gays were forced too wear pink triangles. And Jews had to wear the Star of David. Life was simpler then. The good old days.
But Ronco solves your gay problems. With the new Ronco Gaydar. The Gaydar exposes gays, even those not out of the closet. For only $ 19.95 (plus a small shipping and handling fee) Gaydar takes the worry out of bigotry. Never again have a doubt about that customer. Or strange “Uncle John”. Gaydar takes the worry out of homo identification. Be sure too bring it to “Meet the Teacher Night” at school.

How does Gaydar work? Sorry, I can’t reveal the impressive technology. But here’s all you need to do. Point your Gaydar pistol (Yes, it is shaped like a German Lugar so no one will even know it is a Gaydar) at any person and pull the trigger. Gaydar shoots out a specially developed “gay-detecting formula” that registers on your Gay detector. Just check the Rainbow Detector. The farther to the left, the gayer the guy…or gal. Easy to use. Even a child cn use it. Let the little ones start early!

But does Gaydar really work? Some very famous people seem to think so.

Michelle Bachmann says “WOW, what a surprise. Just for fun I pointed the Gaydar at my hubby. WHOA. I sure never would have guessed.”
Adolf Eichmann the third (grandson of Adolf Eichmann) says “” Grandpa would have loved this . It would have made is life’s work so much easier. He would have killed for a machine like this”
Ted Cruz says” I took it to the Senate. Just as I figured on the liberal side of the aisle. A perfect score. Tested everyone but Lindsey Graham. He disappeared.”
Ben Carson: “As a highly educated doctor I can tell you that this device really works. I went inside the State Penitentiary during visiting hours and WHAMMO. This baby went off like fireworks on the 4th of July. Even some of the guards were “infected.”

Don’t wait. Don’t let “those people” into your public accommodation. Only $19.95 (plus shipping and handling) and you and your family can be gay-proofed forever.

But there’s MORE. Act now and Ronco will throw in JEWDAR absolutely free. Works just like Gaydar but for Jews. Instead of a Rainbow dial the Jewdar has a Star of David that lights up like a Hanukkah candle any time a Jew is detected. Tested at the Wailing Wall. It WORKS! I know. You are thinking. JEWS. Aren’t they all lawyers? Won’t they sue me? NO. Remember, the religious freedom laws do not demand that you justify your bigotry by belonging to any organized religion. You can just be a stand up, stand alone bigot and the law protects you. The law says you don’t even have to practice any religion at all !

That’s right. Gaydar and Jewdar BOTH for only $ 19.95. But wait. There’s more ! Order now and you will get Gaydar, Junior. Just for kids. This handy little Gaydar miniature gun will allow your child to tell which of his classmates has gay tendencies. A lot of power in a tiny package. Start your loved one early in detecting deviants. Feel secure that none of “those kinds” of kids are accidentally invited to junior’s birthday party.

That’s Gaydar, Jewdar and Gaydar,Junior. All for only $ 19.95. But wait, there’s MORE. Yes, the first 100 callers will also get ObamaDar.

Is that guy REALLY white or is he “passing”? Is that a good tan she worked on or was her grandmother’s mother a darky ? Not sure whether or not your child’s classmate is a “mix” of races, part Negro? ObamaDar will give you the answer. Comes with an easy to read Black or White dial. No shades of gray on this dial ! Act now. Call 1800-BIGOTRY.

Only available by phone or at a Bigots-R-US near you. Gaydar. Don’t take a shower in a public place without it!

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Filed under blacks, Christianity, gay rights, government, homosexual, Islam, Israel, Judaism, Mormon, Neoconservative, obama, Politics, Religion, Republicans, Senate, Society

The Slippery Slope of Slippery Slopes

As I walked out to the mailbox on this wintry day I fell 33 times on the ice. Very slippery. A veritable slippery slope of slippery slopes. Which got me to thinking.

Many arguments about “rights” from my conservative compadres these days seem to hinge on the slippery slope idea. The argument is that if you allow the government to do “A”, then the government will do “B”. then the government will do “C”…all the way to “XYZ”. And that, my friends , is the end of civilization as we know it. Doom awaits us.

Take gay marriage as an example. Those who want to ban gay marriage (now declared legal and constitutional in 35 states) have a state’s rights argument. The philosophy behind the argument for not allowing gay adults to marry goes something like this. (Hang on to your hat, it is gonna get slippery)

If you allow gays to marry, then what next ? The government will allow polygamous marriages. Then it will allow animals to marry people. The slope is fast and very slick. Gay marriage leads to human-animal nuptials. Want to be the flower girl at the wedding of Uncle Jed to Barb the Burro ? I thought not.

Another controversy rife with slippery slope reasoning (?) is gun control. If the government can regulate my use of a gun, what next? The government will ban all guns. To everyone. For all times. Then the jackbooted thugs will take over my house. (Usually Obama’s jackbooted thugs, but not always).The end of civilization as we know it. After all, what is more civilized than an AK-47?

It is hard to argue with such unreasonable reasoning. If “A” occurs…then “XYZ”. So, instead, let’s play the game of slippery slopes. In reverse.
Gay marriage. If the state government can prevent two adult citizens from getting married, what next ? Can the government prevent blacks from marrying whites ? Swedish-Americans from marrying Chinese-Americans? Eventually the states will prevent heterosexuals from marrying each other. No one can get married. Or worse, the state (I’m thinking Alabama here) will make it mandatory for cousins to marry. Or for brothers to marry sisters. Or for humans to marry animals ! Slippery slope.

On gun control. If the state cannot regulate guns, what next. People will be able to carry guns anywhere. Into the mall. Into church. Onto airplanes. Into Congress. And people will be able to carry any kind of weapon. AK-47’s in the front row at Xmas Midnight Mass. The wealthy can afford their own nukes. And children can have guns as well. Playgrounds will become realistic battlegrounds with real bullets instead of pretend ones. And animals ! Do you really want to be confronted by a hungry, armed squirrel. They go nuts. A slippery slope from not allowing reasonable gun control to every felon, child, airline stewardess and nun being armed , locked and loaded. The slippery slope.

Law “A” leads to…well…Law “A”. Nothing more. So, beware of slippery slopes. Throw down some salt on the ice. Tread carefully. In the end, all slippery slope arguments end up leading to a fall. Wear extra padding on your butt and use your common sense.

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Filed under Conservatives, gay rights, gun control, homosexual, logic, slippery slope, Society

Darren Wilson and the FBI

(Darren Wilson was the police officer who confronted and killed a black man in Ferguson, Missouri. He was subsequently NOT indicted by a grand jury. he has since retired from the police force.)

I was involved in an internet argument with someone who I will call “Billy Bob” the other day. Billy Bob is a died-in-the-wool supporter of Darren Wilson and his rights to kill unarmed people if he feels threatened. Billy Bob’s main argument is that Wilson was a cop. Being a cop gave him the right to kill.

I disagree. Be that as it may, Billy Bob went one step further. He thinks that Darren Wilson, (now that he has resigned) , is going to end up in the FBI. Really. He does. So,  I imagine the job interview as follows…

FBI: So, Mr Wilson, I see you have 8 years experience as a police officer. Why did you leave the force?

Wilson: I did it for the good of the community.

FBI: I see. Can you expand on that?

Wilson: Yepper. I shot and killed a bad man and people in the community got mad at me. They even tried to indict me but I beat the rap.

FBI: Well. I assume you killed this man for a reason.

Wilson: Yepper. I felt my life was in danger.

FBI: So, he drew his gun first and then you shot back in self-defense?

Wilson: Nope. He didn’t have a gun.

FBI: So, he had a knife and was coming at you and was going to stab you ?

Wilson: Nope. He didn’t have a knife.

FBI: Well,  he was carrying some weapon, obviously. What did he attack you with?

Wilson: He didn’t have a weapon. But he hit me. Hard.

FBI: I see. Couldn’t you have used some self-defense techniques? Some of your training?

Wilson: Nope. I was in a car when he hit me.

FBI: You were in a car? Couldn’t you just drive a few hundred feet away and wait for backup?

Wilson: Never thought of that. But he hit me. Hard.

FBI: So, why did you shoot him?

Wilson: I feared for my life. He was big. REAL big. Made me feel like a 5 year old little boy. So I shot him. I don’t like feeling like a little boy.

FBI: So, you shot him in the leg or arm to incapacitate him ? To slow him down?

Wilson. Nope. In the head. In the body.

FBI: You shot him more than once?

Wilson: I shot AT him about 10 or 12 times. I hit him 6 times. That did the trick.

FBI: So , he was right next to you and you missed 4 or 6 shots?

Wilson: Yepper. That is why I kept shooting. DUH.

FBI: Well, Mr Wilson. The FBI prides itself on being a highly-trained, well-regulated peacekeeping force. We demand top level skills, intelligence, split-second decision-making and respect for individual rights. We do have to use force, but we train our agents to use only necessary force. I really don’t think we will be interested in interviewing you for a position.

Wilson: Did I mention that the guy was black. And very big. And scary. And that he looked like a demon ?

FBI: So. You see demons? You know what a demon looks like?

Wilson: I seen pictures of them. In demon books. And I tell you, this guy LOOKED like a demon. No joke.

FBI: I see. Thank you for coming in Mr . Wilson. And best of luck in the future.

So, Billy Bob, I don’t think the FBI will be calling on Darren Wilson to join the force anytime soon. Thank god.

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Filed under blacks, crime, police

Thank You , Georgia,I’m Sorry

Having returned from a short trip to the south, including a visit to Savannah,  Georgia, I have to thank these southerners for their hospitality. We had a nice time in Virginia, North Carolina, South Carolina and Georgia. So, thanks. But today I saw a news article that causes me to thank Georgia politicians even more and tell the people of Georgia that I am sorry.

It seems as though Georgia’s legislature has decided to pass two laws regarding access to health care in the state. While I thank them for one of these laws, I am not sure about the second one.

First, a law which refuses to accept billions of federal  dollars to fund Medicaid for Georgia’s poor, especially the working poor. While the feds are giving states 100% of the costs of Medicaid this year and 90 % in the future, the politicians of Georgia have generously decided not to accept that windfall. And I thank them. Why ?

Well,  since the people of Georgia are paying taxes into the Medicare/Medicaid system they are helping support people in other states, like New York,  and getting nothing in return. This means that over the long haul more money will be available for participating states, at the expense of Georgia’s citizens. Thank you, once again. Very generous of you.

A second law is a bit more curious. Georgia, after all, prides itself on embracing  those freedoms we all hold so dear. Free  press. Freedom of religion. Free speech. Freedom of association. Which makes the next law a bit curious. This law prevents Georgia citizens from helping other Georgia citizens. It prevents them from helping others enroll in the ACA.

In other words, if a Georgia citizen FREELY desires to enroll in the ACA it is illegal for others to assist him or her.It is illegal for others to try to make that enrollment process easier. To give them needed assistance. It is the ultimate “anti-Samaritan” law. Seems kind of odd in a state where the word “freedom” is thrown around like a frisbee on a college campus. And belief in god is spouted even more often. But, so be it.

What are the ramifications of these laws ? Well, for one, the people of Georgia will miss out on billions of federal dollars in aid. The estimated 70,000 plus jobs based on the increase in health care availability (most in the private sector ) will not be created. Those Georgians without health insurance will continue to either get sick and not go to school or work, hurting the economy, or seek treatment at Emergency Rooms in hospitals. The most expensive treatment. Costing Georgia’s citizens even more money with increased health insurance premiums.

And , quite likely, the better health care professionals will seek employment in states with a more supportive attitude towards the medical needs of people.

All of this because a handful of elected officials hate Mr Obama. There is an old saying which applies: Cutting off your nose to spite your face.

So,  thank you Georgia for your hospitality and for helping pay for my state’s Medicaid coverage. And, I am sorry Georgians.  Sorry that you have to live in a state run by people with such hatred towards Mr Obama that they will allow you and your children to suffer. It is quite a dichotomy. Such nice folks. Such nasty politicians.

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Filed under healthcare, Politics