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The Trump – Mueller Interview

Many folks do not know it but Mueller has already interviewed Donald Trump. The interview was held in private . Mueller had a stenographer take notes. Mr Trump demanded that a Russian interpreter be in the room as well. With my inside contacts, I have obtained part of the transcript.

Mueller: Good morning. For the record, can you state your full name and position.

Trump: Yes. I ..uh.. my name is ..uh…Donald Dennison…no…uh David Douchemugger…uh…wait…Drivel Bongbaker…uh…wait…I have it…uh… let me look in my wallet here. Uh. Donald Trump. Yes. Donald Trump.

Mueller: OK. And your position?

Trump: My position is the best. Best position. i have always been the best, hired the best people. The best. My position is the best position ever.

Mueller: To be more specific. What is your job?

Trump: My job. Yes, I have a job. Is this a trick question? My job is the best president. best president ever. I won the election. I beat Crooked Hillary. Best election ever. Most votes ever for a president since Honest Abe. More popular than Honest Abe. All the polls show it. Fantastic job. I am doing a fantastic job.

Mueller: OK. Let the record show that Mr Trump is the President of the United States.

Trump: I object, your honor. I am the BEST president of the United States. I won the election fair and square. No collusion. No collusion. Witch hunt.

Mueller: OK. Now. In June of 2016 were you aware of the meeting between Paul Manafort, Donald Trump, Jr.,Jared Kushner and 3 of Putin’s agents from the Kremlin? Were you aware they were meeting one floor below you in Trump Tower?

Trump: No contacts at all between my campaign and any Russian. None. Witch Hunt. No collusion. Maybe a completely unimportant meeting one time. So unimportant I don’t remember it. Meeting? What meeting. About adoptions. I love kids. Love adoptions. Meeting about adoptions. No Russians there. Never in Trump Tower. I never heard of Russians. Who is Manafort. Worked for me for a day or two. Never heard of Trump Tower. Where is it? Jared? Jared who? Who am I?

Mueller: OK. Uh. Shortly after being told that the Russian government had derogatory information about the Clintons, you stated that you were going to make a speech about the Clinton -Russia connections. But you never made such a speech. What was the basis of your original claim and why did you not make the speech about the Clinton-Russian connections?

Trump: A great speech. I made a great speech. Everyone said so. That’s not what I say, it’s what everyone says. So many speeches. Great speeches. Crooked Hillary and Russia. So much collusion. If people only knew. It would be the biggest scandal ever. Bigger than the Apprentice. the rating would be amazing. Amazing ratings. No collusion. Lock Her Up. Why aren’t you going after Hillary. Waterboard her. Not torture.

Mueller: Uh. Mr Trump. You seem to be evading all my questions. Can you answer this directly. While you made many statements that you had no contact with Russians, we have  signed contract with Russians to build a Trump Tower in Moscow. You negotiated with the Russians while you were a candidate for president, yet denied any connections with Russia. Can you explain that, please?

Trump: Yes. I will be happy to answer directly.  No collusion. Fake news. Witch hunt. Trump Tower is a fantastic building. WOW. I built it myself. Fine piece of architecture. best ever. I don’t say so. Everybody says so. Trump Tower is in Moscow. Uh. Oh. There is no Trump Tower in Moscow? Wait. Let me make a phone call. Oh. Later? Vlad assured me I could build one in Moscow. That’s in Russia, right? See. I know a lot . No collusion. No hookers in a Moscow hotel. That is fake. I never met Putin. Never saw him. Next question.

Mueller: (sigh). Let the record show the interview has ended.

Trump: Great job. Best interview ever. My answers were fantastic. The best answers ever. No collusion. Crooked Hillary.

 

 

 

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Civil War Mystery

I thoroughly enjoy listening to Don Trump, the President of the United States.  He brings into the light extremely important issues which have been ignored for too long. In his latest interview he once again challenged the American people to expand their intellectual horizons. This time in regard to one of the greatest mysteries in American history.

WHY was there a Civil War in America? What could have caused it? What happened? Until today this dark  period of American history has been shrouded in secrecy. But before I go on,  here are the actual words of our president in an interview on April 30 on Sirius Radio  (not be confused with Serious Radio).

Trump: ‘People don’t realize, you know, the Civil War, if you think about it, why? People don’t ask that question, but why was there the Civil War? Why could that one not have been worked out?

So, let’s all think about the causes of the Civil War. For the first time. What could have been the issues? Why have these causes been ignored by historians and educators for over 150 years? Why has no one come forward to solve this mystery? Sad. Very sad.

So, I decided to do some digging. Although I taught history for over 30 years I must confess that the coverage of the Civil War is just not part of any curriculum.  There is just not enough written about the Civil War to draw any inkling of an idea as to why this conflict occurred. So, Donald got me thinking. Maybe I , and I ALONE, could solve the riddle!

After my third morning beer I set to work on the interweb. I googled “Civil War Causes”. The search offered only 28,600,000 hits. Well, that is no help. Only 28,600,000 references to the causes of the Civil War. Donald was right. Nobody knows !

So I wondered . Has anyone written any book about the Civil War? So I googled Civil War books. I found a New York Times (FAKE NEWS) which claims to have a list of the best books about the war. From the website:

“Far more books have been written about the Civil War than about any other event in American history, and Lincoln’s stack of books towers over that of any other American figure…

OK. Well .  Books.  I mean, You have to READ them. The president of the US is much too busy to read a book. That is hard. I tried to read one and discovered that reading is hard. Very hard. So, I thought. What about movies? Maybe someone, somewhere has made a movie about the Civil War? A movie is easier to read than a book, plus you can eat popcorn and learn at the same time. Brilliant.

Checking Wikipedia I found a list of movies. Starting in 1908 and continuing to today. A lot of movies and documentaries. Over 100 years of movies and films. About the battle between the states. Perhaps one of them has a clue as to the causes of the war?

So if we all work together to Make  America Great Again perhaps we can solve this mystery. Somewhere there is the answer. Until Donald mentioned it no one even cared. Once again, the Educator-in-Chief has caused us to rethink the old ideas and focus on new ones. What could have caused the Civil War? Who knew? Why have we ignored this for so long? Sad.  Very sad.

Do your own research.  Solve the mystery. And send your results to Mar-a-Lago along with a $200,000 entry fee. Donald wants to know. He’ll be glad you did.

https://www.google.com/#q=civil+war+causes

http://www.nytimes.com/ref/opinion/civilwar-booklist.html

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_films_and_television_shows_about_the_American_Civil_War

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