Trump-Kim Summit Success!

Donald Trump and Kim Jong Un will meet in two days for the big summit.  Usually we have to wait until after an event to get a reliable statement about what happened. However, in the days of “alternative facts” that is no longer necessary.

I will save you the agony of waiting to see how this meeting turned out. After all, what actually happens is secondary to what we are told happens. Knowing this saves a lot of time and anxiety. So here it is.

The official White House statement, followed by Mr Trump’s tweets.

From: The White House

Regarding: The Successful Summit with Kim Jong Un

The fantastic President Trump and the most honorable Kim Jong Un reached agreement on a number of issues. An historic agreement. An agreement for all time.

Kim has agreed to give up all his nuclear weapons. Every one. They will be destroyed. The international community will be provided with pictures of the destroyed weapons by the North Korean government as proof. Kim has also agreed to allow all political prisoners free, after a review by his court system. The North Korean government will provide an artist’s conception of an empty prison cell as proof. Kim also promised, on his brother’s grave, he will never try to invade South Korea.

President Trump gave up nothing. He looked Kim in the eye and the little guy folded. This is the greatest negotiation in the history of negotiations. Everyone agrees!

(End of statement)

Trump tweets on Air Force One coming home..

“Little Kim folded like an accordion. Gave up his nukes. Greatest negotiation in history.”

” Just took away all Kim’s nukes. Obama could not do it. BIG FAILURE. I did it. Forced Kim to give in. Greatest deal in history!  Many people say so. I don’t say it, but many people do!”

” Plan to build Trump Tower in Pongoyango, Korea’s capital. It will be fantastic. Biggest tower ever. Kim will finance it. Ivanka will run it. Beautiful girl. That’s what people say.”

“Little Kim is a liar . He PROMISED to give up his nukes. Now he says, maybe. Tower may be on hold. Beautiful tower planned. Now on hold. Kim doesn’t want to pay. Sad.”

“North Korea deal off the table. Obama’s fault. Obama should have bombed North Korea long ago. Soft on crime. Obama was very weak. Sad. Weak man. No deal with Kim. Except the tower. Still building Trump Tower Pongoyango. Mattress sale coming soon!”